I know this is a blog about ‘happiness’ but today I’m just finding it so hard to feel happy. I live in the UK and have obviously been following the repercussions of Brexit with some interest. And by ‘following’ I mean feeling depressed, heart broken, angry, scared, ashamed, upset, cheated and defeated. I have never felt this way about an election before, and I doubt I will ever again.
It’s hard to be positive when something you believe in so much is taken away from you. Something that you can do nothing about. Something that not only affects you but your children, parents, family, friends and colleagues: Everyone. Something which I feel has happened due to much misinformation and misunderstanding. It’s hard to come to terms with.
I have always felt that for the world to move forward we need to work together. I felt the Scottish independence referendum was wrong for the exact same reasons (I’m half Scottish), but my feelings towards Brexit are even more intense.
How can we move forward as a county, nation, continent or world if we refuse to work together? If we simply say “Things aren’t how we like it so we’re leaving – you deal with it”. It just seems childish and ultimately selfish.
Then to hear of the stories of European citizens, people, living in England being beaten within an inch of their lives. The lies our politicians have been permitted to spread which misled much of the public for personal gain (or ideology). The potential breaking apart of the UK. That a politician or perhaps more importantly a mother lost her life for her belief in helping others, being accused as she was brutally murdered that she wasn’t putting “Britain first”. How can British English people ever hold their heads up high again?
Today, I feel ashamed to be British (English). However I am proud to say that I voted ‘Remain’. That my husband voted ‘Remain’. That my daughter’s uncle, grandparents and great grandparent all voted ‘Remain’.
I grew up in East London, living in an an area that was mostly non-white, although I must hasten to add that most of my school friends were born in the UK. They gave me an appreciation of other cultures, other religions and world food. Its an upbringing that I don’t regret and I morn that my daughter may have fewer opportunities to experience this.
‘Leavers’ saying “Get over it / Deal with it” doesn’t really help. It just shows how little they understand how we feel. It feels like we’ve lost a close close family member or friend. You wouldn’t walk up to someone a few days after someone they deeply cared about died and say “Get over it” would you?
I’m now hanging on to the ridiculous hope that I’m living in a dream, that for whatever reason Article 50 won’t be enacted. But I know this is a dream. I know the world we live in has been changed forever. Whether it is for better or worse, the outcome is yet to be truly seen.
How are you feeling today?
